It Must Be Football Season

September 11th, 2018 by The Director

That’s North American football, not soccer. Why would you call that “football” when the sport has a name associated with it and not another sport? Because you like the confusion?

Where was I?

Oh, yes, it’s football season, which is why I see a job posting like Mobile QA Engineer, and I think, “I’m more of a pocket tester.”

Ask an American friend to explain it to you.

QA Music: The Baseline

September 3rd, 2018 by The Director

U.D.O., “I Give As Good As I Get”:

Remember, testers and quality assurance professionals: You should always give at least as good as you get. If not better than you get.

For Your Next Team Destroying Exercise

August 24th, 2018 by The Director

A local business in Springfield, Missouri, allows you to smash things. It’s called a Rage Room.

Although, honestly, it’s really not much different than what we do every day in software testing.

And the QA lab here already has everything I need, from an electric guitar for some ill-rendered heavy metal to a heavy bag to varied martial arts weapons. So I don’t have to leave the cave and see the sunshine this week either.

Or, As We Like To Say, “Trains You For Software Testing”

August 22nd, 2018 by The Director

How Complaining Rewires Your Brain for Negativity.

The article provides steps to help curb your negativity, but why would we want that? Better to use the steps:

  1. Have a clear purpose.
  2. Start with something positive.
  3. Be specific.
  4. End on a positive.

to write better bug reports so long as by “positive,” you say, “I’m sure this is broken” and “I’m sure customers will flood the service desk with calls unless it’s fixed.”

In Case I’m Looking For A New Career Path

August 2nd, 2018 by The Director

I posted on Twitter the other day:

Mostly as an excuse to repost one of my recent favorite animated gifs:

So apparently, I’m looking for a new career, and some recruiter was quick to seize upon it:

Recruiters who perform ill-limited LinkedIn search to blast the results with job offers usually hit me for jobs I’m way overqualified and overpaid for. It’s rare that I get something completely out of the industry like this.

But who knows what I’ll get when I add voiceover work to my LinkedIn profile. Perhaps job offers to do voices for cartoons, which is not unlike what I do daily on conference calls.

QA Music: Why Would A User Do That?

July 30th, 2018 by The Director

I’ll let Lzzy Hale and Halestorm take this one:

“Uncomfortable”.

Unfortunately, I Only Have A Year’s Experience

July 17th, 2018 by The Director

Hopefully this consulting company can find the Senior Hemissourlp Desk person it’s looking for.

Heaven knows, good hemissourlp desk people are hard to find.

QA Music: Metal Makes Everything Better

July 16th, 2018 by The Director

As you probably know, I’m a big fan of Leo Morachiolli, a Norwegian scientist proving every week that metal makes everything better.

Here is his cover of Peter somebody’s song “Sledgehammer”:

“I want to be your sledgehammer” is right on my business card.

I’m Unclear On The GDPR Implications

June 29th, 2018 by The Director

So what happens if I regard this test email sent out to the production mailing list?

I mean, the only content of the message is a Forward to a Friend button.

Which works.

So, is this a successful test or not?

Not My Office, Naturally

June 26th, 2018 by The Director

To be honest, I’ve worked some places where only scapegoats are recognized.

QA Music: The Mondayest Song Ever

June 25th, 2018 by The Director

Three Days Grace, “The Mountain”:

Clearly, The Graphic Designer Was Not A Ninja

June 21st, 2018 by The Director

It’s been a while since I’ve made fun of advertisements in software magazines, but since SD Times is still sending me free copies of their buzzword-laden collection of advertisements amid laudatory stories about their advertisers, I might as well go on with the show.

Check this guy out:

I suspect the designer is trying to show a unit-testing ninja throwing a flying sidekick. But the feet are in the wrong position for it. With a sidekick, the kicking foot is horizontal with the toes forward, and the toes on the bottom foot should not be pointing straight down. The front kick features the foot vertical with the toes drawn back, and but there’s not a leaping variant where the non-kicking foot tucks up like that.

Maybe the fellow is just Russian dancing.

Also note that the product has mock right in the name. How could I not?

You’re More Than A Number To Us

May 11th, 2018 by The Director

A purported eBay missive tells me that I’m more than a number to them:

I’m an alphanumeric variable to them.

You know, it could be a phishing scam. Or it could be an expensive start to a research project that looks no better than a sophisticated phishing scam due to a failed mail merge.

I’m engaging it the same way in either case.

How Can I Improve On That?

May 10th, 2018 by The Director

According to LinkedIn, people found my profile using these search terms:

Tower Insurance + EIFFEL + Reality Television + Alternate

Because, really, that pretty much sums up my career.

Of all those things, the only thing I recognize is that I once wrote an article about the Eiffel tower which got published.

I have to wonder how far into the list of results the searcher had to go to find me.

For a few dollars more, I could bump myself further up in the results.

The Opposite Of The Sound Of Silence

May 3rd, 2018 by The Director

What, you expect me to turn down the Iron Maiden when I dial into the daily stand-up?

Think again.

QA Music: Some Projects Be Like

March 19th, 2018 by The Director

Testament, “Centuries of Suffering”:

Yes, I just got the new Testament album, Brotherhood of the Snake. Which is what I’m planning to call the Testers’ Union when I get enough signatures.

It Was As Though Millions Of Style Guides Cried Out At Once And Were Suddenly Updated

December 7th, 2017 by The Director

Walmart changes name, dropping ‘stores’ and hyphen, as it underscores online image:

What’s in a name? For Walmart, it will soon be a little less.

The company, which became the largest retailer in the world with a huge chain of stores, is changing its name to reflect its increasing emphasis on e-commerce.

As of Feb. 1, it will no longer be “Wal-Mart Stores” and will get rid of the hyphen and drop “stores” from its legal name.

Just kidding; please continue with the normal mishmash of capitalization when referring to corporations, especially our own clients.

Walmart has brought some confusion upon itself, with signage and logos that do not include the hyphen but the corporate name and formal documents probably did.

Ideally, internal communications would use the proper branding so that the habits built into the copy writers, designers, and other communicators would automatically use it whenever they do their jobs, but too often the shorthand name for a company works its way into the copy or iconography. Which just looks sloppy.

Nothing explains the purple Comic Sans, though. Why does the CEO do that in his emails?

To Be Honest, The Pikachu Suit Is In My Standard Test Plan, Too

November 16th, 2017 by The Director

I might have mentioned it before, but I would not mind testing Amazon’s new cashier-less stores (Amazon’s Cashierless Store Is Almost Ready for Prime Time):

Employees have tried to fool the technology. One day, three enterprising Amazonians donned bright yellow Pikachu costumes and cruised around grabbing sandwiches, drinks and snacks. The algorithms nailed it, according to a person familiar with the situation, correctly identifying the employees and charging their Amazon accounts, even though they were obscured behind yellow polyester.

I mean, the Pikachu suit is an integral part of any well-designed test plan.

But I am not running those test cases today.

In the case of Amazon Go, though, the Pikachu suits are a showy bit of theatre, but the real tests would involve more elaborate and time-tested mechanisms for criminal shrinkage like false-bottomed boxes and whatnot. Also, you’d definitely want to try out false positives, where teams would pass the items around and see who gets charged or who gets wrongly charged.

QA Music: Georgia On My Mind

October 30th, 2017 by The Director

Fozzy, “Judas”:

Now go out there and betray some friendly software for a couple bits of silver.

QA Music: Indestructible

October 23rd, 2017 by The Director

“Indestructible” by Disturbed.

I know, the song is almost as old as this blog is. That doesn’t make it any less relevant.


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